The Lowvelder’s excuse for arriving at work late

Arriving for work late is embarassing.

You know the feeling.

While driving into the parking lot, you assess the situation. “What am I going to tell my boss?” you wonder.

You end up tiptoeing into the office.

Image: Youtube.

Nobody will notice, right?


You are met with your boss’ stare. If he or she wears spectacles, the dramatic effect of a condescending stare really hits home.

Luckily, this is the Slowveld. According to some, ‘anything goes’ around here.

If you are a Lowvelder, you whip up one of these totally believable excuses:

  • A lion held me up.

  • The traffic light was not working. Judging by how regularly this happens, your excuse might just carry weight.

  • I was a pedestrian in Riverside. Trust me, getting around there takes a while.

  • A cow blocked the road.

  • Some guy was spinning his car, or ‘making doughnuts’ or whatever it is called. I did not get close enough to investigate.

…And just like that, Bob’s your uncle!

Helene Eloff
Court Reporter

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